According to Weather.com's hourly forecast for Chattanooga, Tennessee, today, Wednesday, March 6 (as of Tuesday 7pm), during all hours of Wednesday and Thursday (!) before 7pm, there will be no If the probability of rain in the entire 43 hours is less than 50%, it will be 1 hour. Think about it... it's incredible! I'm not a weather forecaster, but let's wait and see! Yes, there is already a "flood monitoring" warning in effect. I hope the rain will not be so severe, but as they say in the meteorological industry, "big eyes will not lie."
To take advantage of this frustrating phenomenon, please allow me to reach into our Saturday funny basket and throw out a few cute things to remind you that the sun will come out on Saturday. (Actually, at 7pm on Tuesday night, the probability of rain from now on will drop below 50% (46%) for the first time at 7pm (46%) on Friday night, but as of now, Thursday will also be It's a mess.
Keep faith... Friday will start to be wet but it will be sunny-Glory! ——The chance of rain on Saturday is only 15%...
Until Saturday, there are some interesting things here...
The reason why men are almost always happy
Your last name remains the same. The garage is yours. The wedding plan takes care of yourself. Chocolate is just another snack. You can never get pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to the water park. You can't go to the water park in a shirt.
The car mechanic tells you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station bathroom, because this bathroom is so disgusting. You don't have to stop and think about how to turn the nut on the bolt. Wrinkles add personality. Wedding dress-US$5,000; dress rental-US$100. When you talk to them, people never stare at your chest.
The new shoes will not cut, blisters or hurt your feet. It has always been a mood. The phone conversation ended in 30 seconds-plain. You know the tank stuff. Only a suitcase is needed for the five-day holiday. You can open all your own jars.
You will receive extra credit for the slightest thoughtful behavior. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your three-piece underwear is 8.95 dollars. Two pairs of shoes are enough. You almost never have a belt problem in public. You can't see the wrinkles on the clothes.
Everything on your face keeps its original color. The same hairstyle can last for years, even decades. You only need to shave and neck. You can play with toys for a lifetime. A wallet and a pair of shoes-one color suits all seasons. No matter how ugly your legs look, you can wear shorts.
You can "make" your nails with a knife. You have the freedom to choose to grow a beard. You can complete all Christmas shopping for 25 relatives in 25 minutes on December 24.
Nicknames-If Laura, Kate, and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate, and Sarah. If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately call each other Fat Boy, Baba, and Savage.
Eating out-Mike, Dave, and John will each put in $20 when the bill arrives, even though it's only $32.50. No one of them will have something smaller, and no one will admit that they want to change it back. When the girls got their bills, they took out their pocket calculators.
Money-A person needs to pay $2 for a $1 item. A lady will pay 1 dollar for a 2 dollar item because she doesn’t need it because it’s being discounted.
Bathroom-There are six items in a man's bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap and a towel. The average number of items in a typical female bathroom is 337. Men cannot identify more than 20 of them.
Argument-In any argument, women have the final say. Anything a person says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
The future-a woman worries about the future until she finds a husband. A man never worried about the future until he married.
Marriage-a woman marries a man who expects him to change, but he does not. A man married a woman, hoping that she would not change, but she did change.
Dress up-women will dress up to go shopping, water plants, take out the trash, answer the phone, read books and receive emails. A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
Naturally-men look as good when they wake up as when they go to bed. The woman somehow deteriorated during the night.
Offspring--ah, children! A woman knows everything about her child. She understands dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears, hopes and dreams. A man vaguely knew that there were some short people living in the house.
Thinking today-married men should forget their mistakes. It's no use for two people to remember the same thing!
Only share this information with women you know who have a sense of humor... and those who like to read.
Will Rogers of our time
You often see a TV anchor asking Senator John F. Kennedy a question. People will think he is just a good boy from Louisiana, but don't be misled. The Louisiana Republican graduated with honors from Vanderbilt University, has a law degree from the University of Virginia and a BCL degree from Oxford University, where he is a first-class honors graduate.
The following is an insight into Senator Kennedy's humor:
* - Comment on Cuomo giving us a lecture: "It's like a frog saying you are ugly".
* - "This Ga election will be the most important election in history. Unless you are a taxpayer, a parent, a gun owner, a police officer, a person of faith, or an unborn baby, you don't need to worry!"
*-Louisiana Senator John F. Kennedy described the Democrats as "a well-meaning arugula and tofu crowd."
*——"You can only be young once, but you can never be immature."
* - "The Americans are thinking that there are some good members in Congress, but we don't know what they are for. Others are thinking about how these idiots get through the birth canal."
* - "Dead at four o'clock."
* - "Always follow your heart...but take your brain."
*-"The shortest answer is no.' The long answer is'hell no'."
* - "It must be bad to be so stupid."
* - "When the Mayor of Portland has an IQ of 75, he should sell."
* - "I have been trying to understand the views of Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer, but I can't seem to raise my head so high**"
* - "Go elsewhere to sell your lunatic...we have stocks here."
* - "She has Billy Goat Brain and Robin's Beak!"
* - On a Wednesday, he believes that most Middle Eastern countries are "just like gas station sushi."
* - "You can let goats climb trees, but it's better to hire a squirrel."
*——"1. This has been happening since Moby Dick was a small fish. 2. Never stand between a dog and a fire hydrant."
* - "Our country was built by geniuses but managed by idiots."
* - "It seems that he might do the right thing, but only if he is closely monitored and driven into desperation like a mouse."
*——"Stupid enough to be my own twin."
* - "This is why the aliens don't talk to us."
*-"Democrats are running around, like finding a hair in a cookie."
*-"Chuck Schumer just choked and followed Nancy Pelosi into the bullpen."
* - "Which planet did you skydive from?"
*-"Just because you can sing doesn't mean you should."
*-Senator John F. Kennedy's comment on Nancy Pelosi, "She can sit down and walk with her head!"
Style, style, I said... a man's style!
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